Entry tags:
contact part deux
if this were modern times byerly would probably make you listen to total eclipse of the heart before you were able to leave a message
u can skip me for a bit, just assume he’s listening/processing
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altusimperius
2023-03-27 11:46 pm (UTC)(link)
[Benedict is abruptly very interested in the contents of his folio. His input, including facial reactions, would likely not be welcome here.]
[ If it were not for Benedict's quiet (good call) presence, Bastien might have made it personal: is that what you're doing when you apologize to me, is that what you think I'm doing when I apologize to you. And if it were not for the fact that he does have some faith in Byerly, he might have launched right into an explanation of what the point of an apology is, in detail, as if to a rifter from a world without.
It's still tempting, as revenge for him having asked.
Instead, eyebrows raising from beyond his feet on the desk: ]
Really?
It's still tempting, as revenge for him having asked.
Instead, eyebrows raising from beyond his feet on the desk: ]
Really?
Yes, really.
[ Byerly frowns openly at Bastien's tranquil expression. He knows perfectly well what sort of judgmental thoughts are happening behind that calm. ]
If people didn't want the apologizer crawling in shit, at least a little, then apologies wouldn't sound like they do. Ah, I was wrong, you were right, all that. It's about abasing oneself.
[ Byerly frowns openly at Bastien's tranquil expression. He knows perfectly well what sort of judgmental thoughts are happening behind that calm. ]
If people didn't want the apologizer crawling in shit, at least a little, then apologies wouldn't sound like they do. Ah, I was wrong, you were right, all that. It's about abasing oneself.
[Bene’s eyes flicker up almost imperceptibly. Bruh,]
[ The calm doesn’t crack. Explanation it is. ]
It’s about demonstrating that you understand why someone is upset and that you agree they aren’t wrong to be. Ideally that you are going to stop upsetting them, too.
Rolling around in shit while you do it is optional, but if that’s your preference—
It’s about demonstrating that you understand why someone is upset and that you agree they aren’t wrong to be. Ideally that you are going to stop upsetting them, too.
Rolling around in shit while you do it is optional, but if that’s your preference—
[ This succinct and accurate summary of his advice causes Bastien’s dance steps to slow and then stop altogether, so he is only standing in the middle of the floor holding Byerly around the waist.
He’s not quite tall enough to press his face into By’s neck. He has to settle for his collarbone. ]
He’s not quite tall enough to press his face into By’s neck. He has to settle for his collarbone. ]
Yseult wants professionalism. She doesn’t want to have to tell you it’s alright or think about your feelings. If you grovel, she’ll be disgusted, not pleased.
[ No one in the history of Thedas has ever been chiller than Bastien is right now. He tilts his cup to swab out a crushed leaf of mint with his fingertip and put it into his mouth. ]
Stark has some compassion, I think, but he likes to keep things breezy. He’ll be uncomfortable.
And Flint—you’re the expert on Flint. If he wants you licking his boots, fine— [ not fine actually!!!! ] —but do it in private.
[ No one in the history of Thedas has ever been chiller than Bastien is right now. He tilts his cup to swab out a crushed leaf of mint with his fingertip and put it into his mouth. ]
Stark has some compassion, I think, but he likes to keep things breezy. He’ll be uncomfortable.
And Flint—you’re the expert on Flint. If he wants you licking his boots, fine— [ not fine actually!!!! ] —but do it in private.
Bastien -
[ Oh. Byerly stops too, and feels a pang of guilt. He’s not sure he’s ever gotten a reaction this strong out of Bastien before - And he’s not sure whether he wants to take it back or double down. Make Bastien comfortable again or tease out a bit more of this honesty. ]
I was joking. A bit. [ He runs his hand through Bastien’s hair, and pulls a face at one of the other dancers who’s making a judgmental little noise at them not moving on the dance floor. ]
[ Oh. Byerly stops too, and feels a pang of guilt. He’s not sure he’s ever gotten a reaction this strong out of Bastien before - And he’s not sure whether he wants to take it back or double down. Make Bastien comfortable again or tease out a bit more of this honesty. ]
I was joking. A bit. [ He runs his hand through Bastien’s hair, and pulls a face at one of the other dancers who’s making a judgmental little noise at them not moving on the dance floor. ]
After years of antagonism, [ carries as little judgment as the word antagonism possibly could. He is only doing this because his daydreams about moving into Lowtown and letting someone else do the paperwork for a while didn't cause Byerly to leap up and say yes let's go right now— ] they would not believe it if you did. At best they would think you had been forced, and at worst they would think it was slimy. Maybe a few of them would enjoy it, but not in a way that would make them like or trust you any more.
Honestly, I think nothing you do is likely to win them over right now. Not overnight.
Honestly, I think nothing you do is likely to win them over right now. Not overnight.
[ Prickly, offended - ]
Antagonism? Don't you start with that, too. Any complaints I've had, I've shared only with you in private - and I've done more than my fair share, more than any of the rest of them, to protect mages. I mean -
[ He gestures to Benedict. ]
Antagonism? Don't you start with that, too. Any complaints I've had, I've shared only with you in private - and I've done more than my fair share, more than any of the rest of them, to protect mages. I mean -
[ He gestures to Benedict. ]
[ Bastien nods. By was joking; By was right. In any other situation, Bastien would be appalled to catch himself trying to turn Byerly into him. In this one—he is still appalled, in a more helpless way.
Like he said. He doesn't want By to change. He thinks he might have to anyway.
He resumes some movement. Little steps. Face still pressed to shirt. He can't hear where everyone else is in relation to them, the way he used to, and if he were here with anyone else at all, the disorganized sounds of footsteps nearer and closer would bother him. But Byerly he trusts to watch his back. ]
Do you remember when you made Lord Jauquin so mad he passed out?
[ A cardiac event that is only funny because Jauquin survived (for the time being; fifteen years later, he is the late Jauquin). And because he was an asshole. ]
Like he said. He doesn't want By to change. He thinks he might have to anyway.
He resumes some movement. Little steps. Face still pressed to shirt. He can't hear where everyone else is in relation to them, the way he used to, and if he were here with anyone else at all, the disorganized sounds of footsteps nearer and closer would bother him. But Byerly he trusts to watch his back. ]
Do you remember when you made Lord Jauquin so mad he passed out?
[ A cardiac event that is only funny because Jauquin survived (for the time being; fifteen years later, he is the late Jauquin). And because he was an asshole. ]
Edited (calibrating their likely social circle better) 2023-03-28 15:01 (UTC)
[ Bastien follows his gesture to look at Benedict, whose presence he does very much appreciate, which is why it's awful that he has to say, ]
Benedict doesn't count. Colin barely counts.
[ An unfortunate side-effect of Byerly's habit of particularly befriending and helping outcasts is that they do not have much sway with the movers and shakers of any particular faction, on account of being cast out. ]
To them, [ he clarifies, because of course Benedict and Colin count in the grand scheme of things. ] To them you are not a penniless and disinherited Fereldan mouthing off to authority. You are authority, they are the underdogs, and they perceive you as flippant and dismissive about their larger cause—which you are, sometimes, in a way. You are mouthy and droll and you love to pick at threads for the sake of it, and none of them in that little circle, [ no offense intended, ] have the personality to take that in stride, let alone play along. When you are sincere they don't think they can trust it. It will take more than groveling once to correct that.
Benedict doesn't count. Colin barely counts.
[ An unfortunate side-effect of Byerly's habit of particularly befriending and helping outcasts is that they do not have much sway with the movers and shakers of any particular faction, on account of being cast out. ]
To them, [ he clarifies, because of course Benedict and Colin count in the grand scheme of things. ] To them you are not a penniless and disinherited Fereldan mouthing off to authority. You are authority, they are the underdogs, and they perceive you as flippant and dismissive about their larger cause—which you are, sometimes, in a way. You are mouthy and droll and you love to pick at threads for the sake of it, and none of them in that little circle, [ no offense intended, ] have the personality to take that in stride, let alone play along. When you are sincere they don't think they can trust it. It will take more than groveling once to correct that.
Edited 2023-03-28 16:23 (UTC)
[Rather than appear sting, Benedict gives a tired little shrug. It’s true, most of the rebel mages don’t take him seriously.]
Yes, [ drolly and mouthily, ] I can certainly see why the faction that chooses to exclude its own people on the basis of their background, and whom the leaders of this organization are desperate to appease, and who could kill me with a thought if they chose and who likely would face no repercussions for it - I see entirely why they see themselves as underdogs.
[ He is appeased by Bastien’s amendment, though. A bit. It’s fucking obnoxious being called nasty and antagonistic when he’s just - saying what’s true. Or challenging pomposity. Maker, they’re pompous. ]
So what will appeal to them, then? Artemaeus, you’ve spent at least some time with them.
[ He is appeased by Bastien’s amendment, though. A bit. It’s fucking obnoxious being called nasty and antagonistic when he’s just - saying what’s true. Or challenging pomposity. Maker, they’re pompous. ]
So what will appeal to them, then? Artemaeus, you’ve spent at least some time with them.
Yes.
[ He laughs a little laugh at the memory. He might be a bit kinder - the man is dead, after all - save that the man was also a real shithead. ]
Though really, I like to think he made himself pass out. An animal can avoid a hunter’s trap if it is clever, after all.
[ And he rubs up and down Bastien’s back - unsure what has caused this turn in the conversation, but quite willing to talk him through it. ]
[ He laughs a little laugh at the memory. He might be a bit kinder - the man is dead, after all - save that the man was also a real shithead. ]
Though really, I like to think he made himself pass out. An animal can avoid a hunter’s trap if it is clever, after all.
[ And he rubs up and down Bastien’s back - unsure what has caused this turn in the conversation, but quite willing to talk him through it. ]
Or at least avoid running into it four times in a row.
[ He turns his head so it's his cheek pressed close instead. He's smiling; it's audible, even if By can't quite see at this angle. The laugh and the back rubs have pulled him back from the precipice of dire. ]
It was great. It was—I like you, you know. You're funny and you're clever and you make everything interesting. Every time we talk for more than a few minutes it becomes a little adventure. What's over that hill, what's in that cave.
[ He turns his head so it's his cheek pressed close instead. He's smiling; it's audible, even if By can't quite see at this angle. The laugh and the back rubs have pulled him back from the precipice of dire. ]
It was great. It was—I like you, you know. You're funny and you're clever and you make everything interesting. Every time we talk for more than a few minutes it becomes a little adventure. What's over that hill, what's in that cave.
I like you too.
[ Even if he doesn't quite follow the reason for all this, this odd sentimentality, he answers it; his voice is warm and soft. ]
Sometimes it feels a bit like we're lads together. Not that either of us actually were able to really live out that sort of boyhood. It's being lads in the way we'd have wanted it to be.
[ Even if he doesn't quite follow the reason for all this, this odd sentimentality, he answers it; his voice is warm and soft. ]
Sometimes it feels a bit like we're lads together. Not that either of us actually were able to really live out that sort of boyhood. It's being lads in the way we'd have wanted it to be.
[She smiles, giving a little curtsy.]
It was a combined effort, Messere. Think nothing of it.
It was a combined effort, Messere. Think nothing of it.
[A little surprised to be put on the spot, Benedict glances first at Bastien, then returns his gaze to Byerly.]
I don’t know, exactly. All their answers would be somewhat different, and I haven’t been privy to most of the deeper conversations.
[He hunches his shoulders slightly.]
We could conduct a poll. Anonymously, of course.
I don’t know, exactly. All their answers would be somewhat different, and I haven’t been privy to most of the deeper conversations.
[He hunches his shoulders slightly.]
We could conduct a poll. Anonymously, of course.
[ Hm. By purses his lips a bit, his face thoughtful. ]
I would wholeheartedly embrace a poll of some sort. [ He reflects for the span of a heartbeat, then says - ] Part of the issue is that I truly don't know what might please them, aside from freedom now, freedom forever. Which is not in my power to grant. Maker, if there were something I could grant, something that was truly meaningful to them, I'd give it to them fast as I could.
[ There's sincerity in his voice. A good part of his frustration, truly, comes out of wanting to be kind and wanting to do right by these people but having no real way to do so. ]
I would wholeheartedly embrace a poll of some sort. [ He reflects for the span of a heartbeat, then says - ] Part of the issue is that I truly don't know what might please them, aside from freedom now, freedom forever. Which is not in my power to grant. Maker, if there were something I could grant, something that was truly meaningful to them, I'd give it to them fast as I could.
[ There's sincerity in his voice. A good part of his frustration, truly, comes out of wanting to be kind and wanting to do right by these people but having no real way to do so. ]
[Benedict makes a note, pleased to have something to do, some way to contribute properly.]
I’ll have a draft for you at the end of the day, then.
I’ll have a draft for you at the end of the day, then.
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