contact part deux

[bouchonne]

if this were modern times byerly would probably make you listen to total eclipse of the heart before you were able to leave a message

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[cozen]

[ A kiss to his shoulder, where Bastien's face is still pressed. ]

The exceptions matter. Who people are when they're pushed, it matters.

And, [ less philosophically, ] a few minutes ago you were furious.

[bouchonne]

And now I’m done being furious.

[cozen]

You’re going to make me furious.

[ He doesn’t sound furious. A little grumbly, maybe, in a fond way. He’s never been the kind of person to quibble about whether he deserves something nice, be it the contents of someone’s safe or entirely unwarranted forgiveness. Take what you can get when you can get it, to make up for the times you can’t —

He lifts his head to pull Byerly’s down by the neck and kiss him on the mouth. ]

You deserve to be fought for.

[bouchonne]

Ah.

[ That's all he offers in terms of demurring - just a little noise that gives some indication of well I don't know about that. Any more than that is likely to make Bastien even more "furious" still. ]

Now, now. Don't make this all about me.

[cozen]

It’s about us.

[ While he has it pulled toward him already, he examines Byerly’s face. Just for a moment, before he lets go. There’s coffee to pour.

An attempt at some levity: ]

I did let you drug me. I let you make an honest, earnest man out of me. So you have to know I love you, right?

[bouchonne]

That, I never doubt. Truly, I don’t.

[ He meets that levity with earnestness. As he takes up the coffee, he says: ]

But I do know that…Well. You lived a life of freedom for a very long time. I know that none of this is your natural state.

[cozen]

[ Coffee midway from counter to mouth, Bastien pauses, considering that. It's not a way he's thought about himself. But he isn't very good at thinking about himself — analytically, anyway — so — ]

Yeah.

[ A long drink. A savoring swallow. ]

There's not anything in me that wants to be free of you. Do you doubt that?

[bouchonne]

Of course not.

[ Well. ]

Usually not.

[cozen]

[ Ruminative: ] Usually not.

[ Another drink, quicker this time. ]

Then I am falling down on the job.

[bouchonne]

Ah, it’s my fault that I doubt. Not yours.

[ He swirls his coffee and drinks, a light sip. It tastes quite fine, in spite of the fact that he’d made it with some distraction. ]

I’ll not permit you to blame yourself.

[cozen]

[ Bastien tilts his head slowly to the side, eyes sharp with a focus that means he is not letting that go. But he's smiling, too. ]

You aren't the boss of me anymore.

[ Hip against the worktop, hand on Byerly's chest to give his shirtfront a wiggly little tug. ]

Except when it is fun.

[bouchonne]

Ooh.

[ Byerly turns on the smoulder, grasping Bastien’s wrist and leaning him back a little further over the worktop. ]

I’d be bossing you around right now, sensually, if I didn’t reek so badly.

[cozen]

[ Bastien laughs — like it's funny, but not like it's funny. It can be a joke and hot at the same time. And thank the Maker for that, because it's the basis of the majority of their sex life. ]

Mm, it's not that bad.

[ Having just had his face against Byerly for a prolonged stretch of seconds, he doesn't need to sniff again to be sure.

Back to business though: he twists his wrist in By's grip to grab hold of his hand instead. ]

And it isn't your fault.

[bouchonne]

What, that I reek? I suppose Lowtown is to blame for that.

[ Playful, even though he knows perfectly well what Bastien is trying to say. ]

[cozen]

[ He's still not letting it go, but a second detour never killed anyone. ]

Having adventures without me, were you?

[bouchonne]

I couldn’t very well include you. After all, I was searching high and low for you.

[ It’s light and playful. Again, trying to assuage some hurt and misery by rewriting the emotions felt during that desperate search. ]

[cozen]

[ Bastien smiles wider first, but that's just mirroring, a habit so ingrained he can only help it if he tries. It's only at a delay that he grows more serious, smile reducing down to something warm but less amused. ]

I should have stayed long enough for them to give me my crystal back.

[ He sets his mug down so he can get his arm around Byerly again. ]

Where did you look?

[bouchonne]

Oh, the usual haunts -

[ He lists a few of them off. It’s hard not to notice, though, that the ones he lists are more Bastien’s places than they are shared places. Of course every place one of them goes, the other will go as well - but there are still places that belong to one of them more than the other. Places that are a bit more political, rather than the more decadent spots that By will be the first to suggest. ]

And all those places are horribly far apart. My poor feet!

[cozen]

[ A silly complaint that Bastien takes seriously enough to collect his coffee and move out of their little kitchenette, pulling Byerly by the hand to the couch so he can get off his poor feet. ]

If I hadn’t been here, I would have been looking for you. [ In the decadent places. In the theaters and around the card tables. ] We would have missed each other entirely. Or maybe I would have realized you would be looking for me — but then maybe you would have realized I would be looking for you, and we would still have missed each other.

[bouchonne]

[ Willingly following: ] Isn’t that the plot of - oh, what was it -

[ He frowns, more bothered by being unable to remember the name of the melodrama in question than he would have been a week ago. ]

[cozen]

Hah. Yes.

[ He sits down sideways, one leg hanging off to keep it out of the way as he tugs Byerly down to sit against him and lean back on his chest. ]

The Three Loves of Lady Emeline. But I hope neither of us would have died.

[bouchonne]

[ Right. He lets out a little sigh - half-contentment, half-relief - as he settles back, thoroughly remembering all those details. ]

I hesitate to bring it up, but one of us has died. Oof -

[ Rat Red takes immediate advantage of the availability of a lap to jump up and nest. ]

[cozen]

Yeah.

[ Like this, he can put his nose in Byerly's hair, put off by the smells he's picked up not at all. He looks down at the puppy from the corner of his eye; funny how she's managed to inherit her mother's froofy lap dog instincts despite her mongrel father and early orphaning. Or maybe they taught it to her. ]

I never forget.

[bouchonne]

Mm.

[ It would be easy to make it light. To keep talking about melodramas. But that sober answer has invited a sober response - and Byerly's druthers are running towards sobriety. ]

You know that me loving you - That isn't some strange event, right? That it's not something that flies in the face of all odds.

[ He throws an arm up to loop around Bastien's neck as he nestles his back in more closely against Bastien's chest. The other hand comes out to rub at Rat Red's monstrous ears. ]

You're very easy to love.

[cozen]

[ Maybe Bastien's stillness is an answer; a pause in his movements, even his breath, before a little nod of his head knocks his nose against Byerly's ear. The nod says yes, I know. The stillness says but not really.

Nod aside, when he opens his mouth, it's not to lie. ]

It didn't feel that way at the start. It felt like seducing you.

[ Persistent. Careful. Vying for attention, working doggedly against the obstacle of not being Byerly's more usual stormy, alarming type. No motive but wanting him, and no lies, but after living as he did for so long, even being himself felt like artifice. The role of Bastien in love, performed by Bastien in love. ]

It doesn't feel like that anymore,

[ to stave off that concern. ]